Hi Diljot, your new character looks very interesting. From your word choices (e.g. defeat, lead, victory), I can tell that it is a very strong creature. See if you can add some of the poetic techniques we learned this week to make your poem even more exciting, maybe alliteration? (e.g. sporty and speedy car, defeat the dangerous enemies).
Good on you for giving reading a go. For slide 8, have a look the last sentence on the third paragraph. For some skateboarders, they use their tricks to tell others how they feel. Why might the Olympics change this?
Hi Diljot, Thanks for sharing your character with us. You combined different parts to make a new creature... I wonder how you chose each part? What were you thinking about as you designed it??
I could tell that you had used the example to help you write your poem - great thinking. The poem had a nice sense of rhythm with the repeated phrases, 'I would'. Next, perhaps you could reflect on how you want people to feel as they read the poem.
Please structure your comments as follows: Positive - Something done well Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what they had to say Helpful - Give some ideas for next time or ask a question you want to know more about
Hi Diljot, your new character looks very interesting. From your word choices (e.g. defeat, lead, victory), I can tell that it is a very strong creature. See if you can add some of the poetic techniques we learned this week to make your poem even more exciting, maybe alliteration? (e.g. sporty and speedy car, defeat the dangerous enemies).
ReplyDeleteGood on you for giving reading a go. For slide 8, have a look the last sentence on the third paragraph. For some skateboarders, they use their tricks to tell others how they feel. Why might the Olympics change this?
Hi Diljot,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your character with us. You combined different parts to make a new creature... I wonder how you chose each part? What were you thinking about as you designed it??
I could tell that you had used the example to help you write your poem - great thinking. The poem had a nice sense of rhythm with the repeated phrases, 'I would'. Next, perhaps you could reflect on how you want people to feel as they read the poem.